Deep in the Core of My Being as I Reflect

Deep in the Core of My Being as I Reflect

In the silence of the moment,
on this day,
I just believe.

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A Hidden Silence that is Beyond Meaning

A Hidden Silence that is Beyond Meaning

And I stand alone in a farrago of thoughts,
thinking long and hard as I am cantilevered in a place of empty;
and the birds, as if they are silently commiserating and consoling,
as if they feel the sting of the sad memories of long ago,
as if they want to bare their broken hearts and cry, as if…
I just need to close my eyes even for just a moment and breathe deeply…
I just need to grasp that unseen hope…I just need to catch even a glimpse of a flicker of light for that tells me that healing is just somewhere in the blue sky, in the setting of the sun, in the blooming flowers of spring,
and even in the rain that also resembles tears
for that rain can also be the healing balm…
And finally, I return to the silence of the moment,
to the silence of the past and to the hidden silence that is beyond meaning,
that is beyond all moments…

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The Way of Deliverance

The Way of Deliverance

I carve a path. And I deeply remember the innocent passing white clouds, the broken thorny twigs and scattered stones on the ground, the quiet flowers that witness along the way and the birds that sing as well as cry. They simply surrender to the sun and the rain. They do not question because it is not about questions. It is about just listening with reverence and humility. It is about yielding deeply. It is not just about making sense. It is deeper than that. It is about the essence. And I know from my heart that it is the way of silence, of solitude, of being still, of knowing, of seeing things as they are, that leads me to a place of many beginnings and unending endings, of meaningful interludes, of inner journeying, of contemplating, of the presence of redeeming elements. Yes, it is a moment of deliverance.

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Shifting from One World to Another World

Shifting from One World to Another World

Silence slowly accumulates in the center
and spills over into meanings and manifestations.
I quietly drink my cup of green tea, thinking.
My mind meandering. There is this solace of gathering existence.
It is already 7:30 in the evening but there is still the pleasant pale sunlight
temporarily nullifying the struggling dark night of winter.
It is springtime but still steely cold outside.
The coffee shop is almost full. And I am still thinking.
Then I went back to my reading. I went back to Homer’s Iliad in the ancient world.

Shifting from one world to another world. So mysterious. I can only imagine.

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It is in the Heart

It is in the Heart

Things grow in me as they unfold when I walk.
It is some kind of a deep process, as walking is a process of seeing
and seeing is discerning and discerning is knowing with deep understanding.
And as I go beyond, I see connections and relationships in an
intricate architecture of one and all.
The crux as I discover it is how I define myself in relation to the unfolding experiences,
as they amalgamate with a much larger and broader experience of what is beyond,
that even our neighbor who walks her dog every morning
partly defines who I am in the grand scheme of things.
This is how I live in innocent wonder as I wander
as I go back to the roots of longing and belonging…

that is in the heart.

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My Walk Knows

My Walk Knows

A bitter cold night…a long stretch of lonely road…no stars above, no squirrels, no raccoons, no humans…I walk quietly in the company of a sub-zero wind, first with bare mind, then with an economy of thoughts…I am intimate with the night…it is my conduit to the real world…it defines the existential character of my walk…and then something stirs in that lull space deep within me, a tingling sensation, as I imagine the stirrings happening underneath the ground I walk on…I try to pursue it along my line of thoughts…succumbing to a dependence on logic…but I cannot comprehend it…there is a shimmering of nothingness…I cannot deny there is that something…an existence…that is hidden…for a couple of minutes, I plumb…deeper and deeper…still no explanation…no disclosure…and then I just yield to what is going on…yet I just happen to know…my walk knows…the night knows…perhaps in another walk, another night, a revelation…and then the cold wind starts to bother me…and I become aware of my walk…

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And Then There is Beauty

And Then There is Beauty

every step of the walk,
every silence,
every solitude,
and in each moment,
a meaning.
an engagement with life
at the heart of being,
about what matters.

the complexity and profundity
of what is simple,
of what is of the heart,
of what it is to be fully human.
that is all there is to it.

it is an answer to a calling,
and then a conviction.
and that in every move,
a revelation
and a conversion.

and then, yes, there is beauty.
this is what makes the experience richer
and deeper.

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